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Matters of the Spirit

Roads Less Travelled


Lately, my mind has been meandering through the roads, paths and alleyways of my past, and I’ve found myself regretting some of my choices, regretting parts of the life that I once lived, and sometimes wondering how things would have turned out if I had been a different person. Regret brings suffering, and a few days ago in my suffering, I heard the stern voice of Byron Katie reminding me, ‘you aren’t suffering because of your choices, or the life you’ve lived, or the person you’ve become. All those things were and are as they should be.You’re suffering because of the thoughts you are now having about those things, and those thoughts need investigation.’

Those familiar words stopped me in my tracks, made me pause for a moment, then do a rewind back to the past.

I remembered a conversation that I’d had with a group of people, in which we were discussing our school days. One of them remembered my desperately unmemorable school-life, turned to me, and laughingly asked ‘So Yaz, what was it that YOU achieved at school?’ Most of the people around the table were successful in their current lives and in their school days had much to brag about; they had been swimming champions, football stars, A-students, school drama celebrities or had just been the popular kids that everybody sought to emulate. A social person, I’d participated in every communal activity that school had to offer, but had been quite unremarkable when it came to the talent that was required to stand out from the crowd. The person making this jibe wasn’t being spiteful in any way; he was looking to tease me, to get a rise, and I surprised myself with my response.

I turned to everyone at the table and said words to this effect:

‘All of you have achieved what a lot of people would feel are remarkable things, whether it was at school, or as you got older and embarked on your life. But if we analyze what you’ve done, you haven’t exactly wandered from the norm. You’ve got great qualifications and have got good jobs, nice houses, and super cars to drive. Maybe you’re even great at your jobs, and sometimes receive accolades for that. And you can trace all this back to your achievements at school. BUT! As far as I am concerned, if you haven’t wandered from the norm, you’ve achieved nothing at all in terms of your inner growth. All you’ve done is do the same as the last generation did. And the one before that.  And the one before that. You’ve done nothing new. You’ve taken outer pathways forged by other people.  I didn’t achieve anything at school. I wished I was ‘clever’, good at sports; I wished I could be like everyone else, but I didn’t know better. I didn’t realise then that to be like everyone else would end in the most unsatisfying life one could lead.  But I figured it slowly out as I grew up, and I went on to do things that no-one at this table has done.’

The table was silent, and a few of them shot me looks that said jeez, what’s got into you?!! But I wasn’t finished. Knowing the people at the table, I asked them this:

‘At a young age, would you have had the guts to pack up your bags, hoist your new-born baby onto your back, leave your home town with your husband and go to live in a completely foreign country, with no extended family support,  where no-one speaks English? And all this for a pittance of a salary, a home with crumbling walls, a hole-in-the-floor toilet, water that only hit the pipes every two weeks, because to get to the top you have to do a lot of ‘apprenticeship years’ first? Would you have had the courage to change the profession for which you’d trained for four years (BECAUSE no-one spoke English) and train to become an English teacher instead? Once you’d reached a high point in your career, would any of you have left the comfort of your highly paid jobs, fabulous all-expenses-paid villas and private schools for the kids, to leave for a new country and open your own business (with no experience of doing such a thing?) Have any of you followed the strange callings of your heart, callings that have nothing to do with established ways of thinking? Or would you have ignored them, because they couldn’t be validated by science? Have any of you spoken to people from other planetary systems? Or do you believe that such entities don’t exist because you’ve been told this by ‘educated’ people with closed minds and large egos? Would you have had what it took to wander from the beaten path of humdrum human life and found your own road to travel? Or were you too afraid of being alone, away from the madding crowd of human sheep? Have any of you heard a plant speak its mind? Or would you have been too closed-minded and afraid to hear it? To heal a mentally ill family member, have any of you travelled through the different dimensional frequencies of this world to find out what is wrong? Or do you cling to your mundane, limited way of being in the world and tell yourself the way to go is to put sick people in a mental institution and drug them up? Has anyone here travelled out of their body and seen things that have no words to describe them?  Do any of you have the guts to answer your own questions, by delving deep inside yourself for the truth, or do you still need to look to religious institutions to answer your most pressing spiritual questions?’

That evening, I managed to silence a large group of quietly arrogant people with my wine-fuelled rather dramatic speech and questions.  A few people scratched their heads in confusion, and others doubled their drinks orders, but I had realized the value of the roads that I had travelled. And I remembered this episode as I reached back into my past and foolishly regretted some of the adventures I had taken. Once again, Byron Katie’s voice rang out and she asked, ‘Who are you when you’re not thinking those negative thoughts about your life?’

The answer to that came easily. When I drop those negative ideas, I am happy having travelled the open highways of my mind. I realize that my heart has always determined the actions that I’ve taken. I’ve never had a choice in anything I’ve done, even though it has felt like I have, because when something is meant to be, I am urged by my spirit. Logic is a human lie that tells us how things ‘should’ be, and it is the reason why people stay unhappily stuck in their humdrum lives, ignoring the call of their hearts. I’ve climbed some weird and wonderful mountains and encountered unspeakable extraordinariness. And all of it has led me deeper into the space of my heart, and further from the heaviness of the mundane world. Regret is a temporary madness, a lapse into human thinking. Thank God for people like Byron Katie, who remind us that our journeys are important, that everything is meant to be just as it is, and we are just who we are.


About Yaz

Hi Everyone! Please check out my site. There you'll find a range of subjects on which I've expressed my world view. I always challenge myself and others to move out of their point of view and try seeing things from another perspective. Your point of view will always be there if you don't like mine! And I'd love to hear from you. Perhaps you'll shift something in me. This is the journey to the True Self and I love it. Lots of love to you all!


18 thoughts on “Roads Less Travelled

  1. What a spectacular post, my wondrous, Yaz…such spirit, wisdom and inspiration! I do love Byron Katie and those remarkable “questions” as well! Love, always, Linda

    Posted by Linda Willows | January 30, 2013, 3:45 pm
  2. GOOD ON YOU!!! I can’t HANDLE people like that! HEllo there is more to life then your car and job! Inner growth is SO hard and difficult I am so sick of people in society who laugh at this imposable feat! Kudos for you to take the high road!

    Posted by JasmineKyleSings | January 30, 2013, 3:55 pm
  3. You tell them Yaz. Xxx

    Posted by Jools | January 30, 2013, 4:53 pm
  4. This was just AMAZING! Good for you and thank you so much for sharing. “I didn’t achieve anything at school. I wished I was ‘clever’, good at sports; I wished I could be like everyone else, but I didn’t know better. I didn’t realise then that to be like everyone else would end in the most unsatisfying life one could lead.” This line hits home. My ten year old daughter isn’t the most athletic in the bunch, and has often struggled with it when she’s that last in every race, etc. I am trying so hard to teach her how insignificant that all is in the grand scheme of things.

    Posted by littlemisswordy | January 30, 2013, 6:46 pm
  5. Wonderful post! Thank you. And today I actually caught myself resisting joy! Pushing it back down into my belly and feeling nervous about it. And then…I just laughed and laughed and laughed. Such a wonderful life this is and the joke is on me!

    Posted by Terry S. | January 30, 2013, 10:40 pm
  6. Yaz this was wonderful. This statement alone made my night: “I am happy having travelled the open highways of my mind.” No matter what was going on in my life, whether I was feeling less than who I thought I should/could be, or whether I was flying in the face of challenge, I felt great ease in traveling the thoughts and curiosities my brain provided me with. I hope that makes sense.

    Posted by Chatter Master | January 31, 2013, 2:34 am
  7. Another incredibly astounding post Yaz. You nailed it again. You are such an incredible and wise woman and that wisdom was achieved not by grades at school necessarily, but life experiences no doubt. School never provided me with much that has helped me in real life. School created a lot of anxiety for me and it certainly was not what I learned that helped me with the real life lessons. Like you I have chosen the road less travelled in my life. Bless you for having spoken the words you did with that group. I couldn’t help but smile as I read your post wondering how many are still your friends or acquaintances after that speech, or how better yet how many did you awaken with your words that evening. You certainly gave them lots of food for thought. 🙂
    Bless you!! xo

    Posted by Suzanne McRae | January 31, 2013, 7:08 am
  8. Yaz, thank, thank you for writing this. As I look back at my life, I have taken the inner path, away from the norm. You made me realize, it’s an extraordinary life to chose the road less traveled. Hugs~

    Posted by sufilight | January 31, 2013, 9:47 am
  9. Yes, that was completely awesome. I would love to have been a fly on the wall. Wine-fuelled sounds like a good idea if you come up with that. I tend to avoid those people, let alone confront them. Of course we don’t know what they think about in the quiet of the night, those super outwardly successful people. Maybe they had arrived at the point of looking within for comfort, once looking without no longer sufficed, as it surely couldn’t.

    Posted by Joy is now | January 31, 2013, 3:08 pm
  10. Thankyou. Your blog was such a pleasure to read. My life has been colourful with many differing life events, all of which I have embraced in the knowledge of where they have guided me today. I never felt like I belonged anywhere, ( until afew years ago when it came into my awareness that a sense of belonging came from within, not from outward living space) yet I never felt alone as I was blessed to travel my journey, seeing,hearing and sharing wisdoms, laughter and tears with faery, spirit, tree, rock and water energy, chatting with the insects and animals. My teenage daughter is now walking that path of being labeled ‘weird’ from friends and ‘abit strange’ from her teachers, yet it is her that is the real teacher here, as she shares her wisdoms that the trees and pixies are shaing with her. She walks proud and happy and quite often says ” hey Mum it doesnt matter if they think Im wierd, because I know Im not, and talking with the trees and pixies is so much fun and they share very interesting stuff and my friends and teachers are just jealous because they are missing out on these beautiful beings and energy”. She is truly blessed and as I watch all her friends choose study subjects that their parents insist they learn, my beautiful daughter is studying that which she wants. My guidance to her is ”to always choose your subjects and life directions and choices, from that which makes your heart sing and dance and not from what you think you should be doing”. For there is no rights and wrongs for every journey is beautiful and full of (inner) growth and wisdoms. Life is truly magikal if you follow your heart directions.

    Posted by Jill Tini | January 31, 2013, 10:45 pm
  11. actually I think it’s good to meet up with people like that, it keeps it all in perspective. Anytime, we get to reflect and actually feel proud is time well spent. Thank you sister… you’re beautiful!

    Posted by adriana | January 31, 2013, 11:48 pm
  12. This is a very good posting 🙂

    Posted by poet365 | February 1, 2013, 4:56 am
  13. Not many people would have the courage to speak up as you did, Yaz. You are an inspiriation to us all!

    Posted by Denise Hisey | February 2, 2013, 1:01 pm
  14. I love this Yaz, utterly love it.

    I’ve been visiting a few times to see your latest posting and voila! today I scored 🙂

    I absolutely LOVE how you gave those people food for thought – and ‘quietly arrogant’ is exactly it. You – and actually, myself in a different way – have most distinctly broken away from the herd and travelled a road not paved by former generations. DANG I wish I was at that gathering. I would have LOVED to drink in all their expressions. Every one of them, with their partner that night, would have commented about what you said, Yaz. You would have had them ALL thinking.

    HiFive, Sister!

    Posted by WordsFallFromMyEyes | February 2, 2013, 10:24 pm
  15. I can imagine you put quite a stir into the evening… It doesn’t really matter what anyone else thinks; it’s up to us to be true to our own experience. Whether or not anyone understands, is really irrelevant. If this is the message that others read of your post, Yaz, you will have done a great service… But hey, that’s part of your experience too… Opening roads for others to travel…. 😉

    Posted by carolynpageabc | February 4, 2013, 2:56 am
  16. Hi Yaz,
    I bet you they are still thinking about your response. It was not malicious, reading it, it just felt like a revelation had shown itself to you and probably as you were stating it. Sweet work!

    Posted by jazzytower | February 8, 2013, 3:21 am
  17. My dear Yaz!
    I felt a swelling pride rise up within me as I read this post. More than the outstanding words spoken that night. It is the pride in meeting someone who has taken many roads less travelled. It is the pride of knowing you made choices and counted the cost and stuck by it. It is for so many things and for so many lives I am sure you have touched along the way. I am glad to be here today, even if it’s just through this mode of communication, to have known you. With love and admiration.

    From your friend who tries to take most roads less travelled (sometimes with trembling knees), Sharon

    Posted by aleafinspringtime | February 18, 2013, 1:50 pm
  18. Funny thing about courage & clarity, every now & then, they catch us by surprise- love it when that happens.
    Here’s to u!

    Posted by willowmarie | May 22, 2013, 11:19 pm

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